Lately I’ve Been Consumed


I’m busy fighting the good fight with:

  1. My Kickstarter for Equality.Education
  2. Helping students apply to college
  3. My Job
  4. Advising on an office move
  5. Editing APA papers for Masters theses

My ambitions just weeks ago when I wrote about Ayuverda, examining how to improve my self health, have gotten away from me. I don’t dream of copper bottles, but abstain because I worry that such an expenditure is frivolous when non leaking copper bottles are $25+. I abstain because I’m too busy to think simply of things like “wants.”

Instead of reading my own words, hurriedly editing a NY Nomads blog and then posting, I’ve been rereading the emails I send out for work or as part of the publicity campaign to raise awareness for my Kickstarter.

It’s a wonderful thing to be so productive. I’ve long been best at helping others realize their vision that it is invigorating to find myself back on what I do best, planning and finessing the fine pieces that others orchestrate.

Helping Others With Their Projects

The people I assist make so many fine things – films, CNN series, important research on the effects of art therapy on treating senior citizens, prisoners, those ailing with physical or mental illness, or are burgeoning students that I know too will go on to do magnificent things!

Working On My Own Project – The Kickstarter

It’s hard cookies to have to work on something of my own. Maybe it’s because I have to treat what many are using as part of their full-time effort as a hobby. Hobbies are meant to be enjoyable right? Because it’s not enjoyable sleuthing out who to contact about this project, not did I enjoy writing a script for the Kickstarter video. It’s all becoming a bit manic, and it takes every piece of me to resist working on it at all, even if it is nearly half funded.

Either which way I HAVE to make sure that I am not letting my work consume me. I need an expressive outlet to speak all those things that have nothing to do with being productive or helping others.

It is going to take more than just taking trips out of the city to find personal meaning in the collaboration of things I do.

  • It’s going to take morning runs that help me clear my mind and keep up my physical strength.
  • It’s going to take not stopping during said runs to address work matters, cause once I’m sitting on a bench, my run is nearly at an end.
  • It is going to take being selfish and “unproductive” ignoring those feelings in my head.

It’s not easy being or wanting to be a productive person. We’re told everywhere how important it is to work all the time. Images of success surround us, whether it’s witnessing

  • Those on Instagram with hundreds or tens or even single digits thousands of followers and all the glossy photos that accompany

  • Those who manage to get by running Travel Blogs and YouTube channels.

I have some envy to deal with. Those people work hard. Lucie must constantly think of how to make her life photo worthy, and Taylor spends hours planning, staging, shooting, and editing her videos.

What I do is un-photo worthy or so personal to the people that I help that I owe it to them not to post about it. I see the private, quieter side of lives, or the all the noise in between.

It will be a long time till I live a life that is mine enough that I can fully share, but that is the way it is for most of us, and we should understand that the more outwardly signs of success we are inundated with from media are specially carved out niche sectors that all consume the subjects’ lives, no matter how much fun they may entail.

And I love helping people.

I love helping them do better, feel better, be better. My indirect effects are built into their own effects. It’s pretty cool.

This blog I suppose has been a long-winded way of saying that I’m grateful for this medium of expression, and I hope to write more, no matter how many people go on to read it. I’m just glad to have a place where all I discuss some days is me, even if it does seem selfish.

Un-photoworthy unkempt and natural.